Many of you know about some of the most private details of my life at this point..
Some of you would even say I’ve over shared…
I guess that’s the beauty of what happens here we all have a choice. To come together under a common bond and share the joys and
sorrows of each others lives. Some to comment, some to watch from the shadows and judge. Either way I made a decision when I first started
blog to be open. Many people forget that this site didn’t start as an Art blog but as my personal journal cataloging my life and struggles with coming to
terms with Young Onset Parkinson’s disease. This journey has taken me around the united states and abroad I’m happy to say I’ve shared every step along the ways, the good the bad and the very ugly personal truths of my life that in reality many of us share in common but would never put out there the way I do.
I’ve said it before and Ill stand by it. I’m a man, no different than any other with the slight exception that I paint and write my heart and soul for all to see. I end 99% of my posts with a kind word. And I pose some hard questions and thoughts because I believe that one man and one voice can change the world.
Art and words have lost their meaning and I will not stand for it another second. For if YOU will not Be Brave and Be Bold or Thrive in the life you have….. I will. If given the chance I would take your hand and shout your name from the roof tops to show the world your brilliance and compassion. Live your words or don’t use them at all. At this point I’ve lost all of it. My job, my career my home and my family and Ill be dammed if I’m going to silence my heart and soul now.
I just received word that I’ve been accepted into a local art co-op. 4 floors of prime down town retail, commercial and loft living space. A place that is positioning its self at the edge of creating an new feel a new scene thriving and ready to make Art believable again. Any person can put brush to canvas, lead to paper and glue a stone to a ring. But only a few can create through there passion to express that love, fear and strength through their art. So again I say…to you.
Be Brave, Be Bold and Thrive in the life you have… No… life is not easy for any of us. But if I can live through the things I’ve seen, done and had happen to me then you can too. I believe in you. I’ve seen your strength, beauty and passion.
That’s all I’ve to say. Namaste Benjamin 1970-current “A life in progress”
The Story behind the Art and Artist of Tempest:
Id like to say my life was a fairy tale full of dreams fulfilled, wishes granted
and time well spent. To do so would be far from the truth and a rather boring story.
In Tempest we see the turbulent clouds of dark purple and green both colors hopeful yet full
of a troubled heart and life. Struggling to find my way on this new path that life has chosen for me.
The form of the figure one could say is female in its curves full of soft sweeping motion and a resemblance
of a musical clef. I her shoulder and breast is a figurative form of infinity giving reference to a belief that I have
that all things are one both past and present. Also in reference to our human cycle of life destined to
repeat our pasts until the puzzle is solved.
She holds her head high above the sky yet in a position of sadness as so often I do. Sad for the hurt in this world,
sad for the hurt in my soul. The window shines a soft yet illuminating light and for me is also the window to my heart
and soul. of two minds hoping to give light to those I encounter in this lifetime and the light that shines out of the darkness
that I so often find myself in. One could ask how someone so tormented could always wishes everyone well, joy, love and happiness.
Its simple I don’t ever want anyone to live through see or feel things that I’ve experienced in my life.
The window, of hope in the darkness.
The spheres find their way to the Tempests side as she stands strong in the calm of the dark purple calm.
Circles, we could write a book on the metaphorical meaning of the circle. Matter of fact there is probably
a guy sipping scotch on a beach somewhere who has. For me in this piece the are eternal, life, death alpha and omega.
From one we have the tree of life emerging from the darkness of the shadow. An ever-present reminder that even in
the darkest of times life will find a way to carry on. From the other sphere we have a cord somewhat of an umbilical
to the tempest also representing the twists and turn of this elegant dance of existence we call life.
Please take from this piece what you will it has and never will be my intent to force my will upon the viewer.
Life is hard, mine, yours, his and hers but life is also beautiful full of hidden graces.
The spring breeze scented with flowers that come but once a year.
Summer sunsets so magical people make a living chasing them down to simply capture the moment.
A child’s first breath and the unconditional love of an old friend.
First kisses and last dances these are the things that make weathering the storm worth living.
So it is with these words from my heart to yours I give you and world. The Tempest.
Tempest ~ My Girl Collection
41.5″ x 48.5′
Mixed media
Inks and Acrylics
2014
Close up 1.
Close up 2.
Close up 3.
Where we started.. As always Be Brave, Be Bold and Thrive in the life you have.
Namaste
Benjamin
2014
A life in Progress
**Ink sketch done by Picasso
So often when I paint I let things flow, I’ve spoken about it a number of times. I do believe that there is a relationship between the paint and I. It’s not always about me imposing my will upon the piece but a true symbiotic relationship between the paint and I. I’ve been up since 2:30a after catching a few hours of sleep last night. I must say I’m very excited to bring you today’s update. Yes there are still messy edges that need to be refined, and most of the work thus Farrah’s been to the upper half of the piece. I think she’s getting to a point where true nature is coming through. So please let me introduce a work in progress From the My Girl Collection:
Tempest
41.5×48.5
Ink and acrylic
I’m going to show a number of shots some maybe similar just with a different light source.
I have to admit this morning as I dragged myself off the couch and into the studio I wasn’t sure if I could do it today. Parkinson’s has taken away a great deal of range of motion and arm strength especially when it concerns holding my arms upright. Not to mention physically gripping the brush for a long period of time. As I started in my arm ached, hips pulsed with pain and a few times I simply sat and looked at her thinking how….how can I do this? Well as always, one moment at a time and slowly but surely she started to come together. My hope is to have her completed before I leave for England this Friday, we’ll just have to see hoe it goes. I do want to take a few moments and thank each and every one of you, especially those who take the time to comment, over the past 3 years I’ve almost given up a number of times but because I’m a stubborn Irish bastard and I have the support of everyone here I haven’t. So thank you, thank you for helping me keep my dream alive. I know that if my dad was alive he’d be proud. As always be brave….be bold…and thrive in the life you have
Life is a funny thing sometimes, full of firsts and last. Today for me is hopefully a day filled with firsts. This morning I shall take “Hearts on Fire“ the first piece to be created in the new studio to be shipped to its new home.
I also will have a first medically. I have my first appointment with my new neurologist today.
Actually she is a “Movement specialist” which basically means she specializes in PWP. I guess because we move funny 😉 Sadly I’ll be attending this rather major event solo as M has a surgery to attend to with her Mom. But on a very exciting and highly positive side. The main garage at the back of the house has now been hyper organized and is ready for use…Yes.. The car is happy once again, it gets to sleep inside. YAY!! You forget such luxuries when you always park your car in the garage. Like waking up and climbing into a nice warm car. Or not having to defrost ice and frost off the vehicle before you can go anywhere. Tis often these small luxuries that I forget about until they are gone. Make no mistake it is a luxury having a car let alone a place to put it in. I’m very thankful simply to have a house to put myself and children.
Okay well back on track then, I must say I’m very excited about a few things coming up in life. I just purchased some new wood panels from my wood guys. The reason I love these guys is simple. Most of the time when you walk into a “mans” store ( which is a joke btw) so please don’t take offence, if your not dressed in coveralls’ and layered in a fine powder of construction dust the service it crap and when you finally get some you either get treated like a newbie or simply an idiot. These guys that I buy from are not that way at all which I completely appreciate. I buy the panels in these huge sheets then the guys with their giant wall saw cut it down into manageable pieces for me, they’ve even loaded into my car on days when I feel exceptionally horrid. Wow! I’m wandering tons today… to get back on track I have a ton of new panels cut, some BIG pieces some normal 24×36’s and then my 24×24’s. Point being I’m happy. I have a new home that wont try to throw me down the stairs. I have a new studio in which I can both paint and have friends and clients over to and thanks to M and the kids with the back garage cleaned out I can set up my “shop” area so I can cut my own panels because I still have all of that beautiful vintage paneling I was given a while back.
Something I wanted to mention because it came up in conversation the other day, did you know I take trade as payment for paintings. So if you’ve ever had your heart set on a piece or a print but find that what ever price is listed is not doable please don’t hesitate to ask. I’m far far from being a rich man, I mean think about it. I live on a SSDI check that comes from the government, the things I need in my life are very few and very simple. And yes when you push the “donate” button on this site the funds really do towards pills and paint. I wont even go into the cost of being sick in America. Matter of fact I think a number of people have made documentaries on it already.
Well I’ll be a bit of a ghost around WP today as I’ll be heading out of town to go see my new doctor 3pm pst, if you want to chat you can find me fluttering about on Twitter and Facebook. I may end up staying overnight in Portland tonight depending on how I feel after the appointment. Often these things take a great toll on me physically and mentally so we’ll see how it all goes. Thanks for letting my monkey mind chatter away and sorry to be so wanderrie this morning. As always Be Brave, Be Bold and Thrive in the Life you have.
Much love.
Benjamin
ps. I need a new laptop 😉 mine died.
How does one “fight the good fight”? How do the weak become strong or the timid become brave? Because of people like you. And how does one truly give thanks to gifts they receive in life? There are so many ways that one can give thanks.
So it can be said especially during this holiday season I’m thankful for you. I appreciate you. You’re words give me strength, inspiration, hope, courage and passion. So thank you. I know so many of you ( us ) enter this holiday season with the burdens of the year behind us but still full on your backs and minds, you may wonder how,? How can I ( us, we, you and I ) go on? I’ve felt the same many many many times. When I was first diagnosed with Parkinson’s disease I had really no idea what to expect. Then slow, steadily and with out fail I watched as if from the outside my life fall away and I had very little if any control. Slowly I lost my ability to communicate well enough to run large companies the only thing I’d done since I was 18 years old. I watched as my body, a once well trained fighting machine became weak and unbalanced. I watched as my once steady hands began to tremble like a cold baby bird. I was scared, still am, but then something happened…..I found you, all of you and you found me.
So today I give thanks, thanks for my life that I have, for the friends and family that I’ve made with many of you. For it is the strength, hope, courage of many that build a world so strong with a voice so loud that nothing is impossible. It is because of you that the world is a better place. No matter how far beneath the struggle of life you may feel from time to time know one thing. You are strong, you are brave and you are beautiful and intelligent, worthy of all the good thing life has to offer. I believe in you, I appreciate you and I am thankful for you.
Happy Holidays everyone. Without you I never would have had the strength to become the man I am today.
Expressions of my life - An evolution of art. 