I ran with love in my hand like a child unaware to keep the sharp point facing down.I slept with angels and played the Devils and danced beneath the pail moonlight. Just to say I’d kissed the devil and lived to tell.
I trusted full and completely for lies were nothing but rumors and things bad boys did. Thinking I was righteous I won every single fight. Saved every process I met and walked round
Before I knew I was something….. But know I can’t remember. What it was, I’d fought for to long let me charges side to to many years.
Things slipped through my fingers and splash upon the floor,memories that makes stop and linger for a moments time stop. Memories so real they yank the tears from my heart. A stillness came as the chaos washed me clean and there I lay, torn and broken from a childhood of dreams left tortured and abandoned by love and misguided dreams.
Didn’t they ever tell not to tell a lost boy you love him.? For are we not the stewards of love? Are we not the protectors of the small,weak and the uncared for? This love of love has left me split, broken with the desire to love and care. The desire to take all of your problems away and show you the life one can lead free of care of man kinds worry and loss.
In between real life and what I call real life there’s a time I paint. Sometimes it’s two minutes sometimes it’s two days without sleep, enough whiskey to make Charles proud and enough tears to make Plath smile. Life has been going by so quickly these days I feel like I’m hardly painting but then I realize that I’ve never really stopped. Someone asked me the other night if I show my work… An it made me think of all the lives I’ve been blessed to know and come in contact with. How many pieces of original artwork I’ve strewn across this world… The question made me smile and I replied “Yes, I show my work.”
Living a life with a un-curable progressive neurological disorder illness isn’t the way I planned to spend the rest of my life but at least I can say when it’s all said and done that I live, loved, painted and wrote with all that I was. I hope in your lives you too can feel what’s it’s like to live. Not without fear, worry or pain, but live through it to the amazing freedom that lives on the other side.
Please enjoy the current works in progress.
And as it so often happens during the course I me putting this post together the above piece has changed so more photos will follow but may be out of context….sorry.
Then we have the blue/green that is for the same group of people.
This piece is funny to photo, due to the layering it’s really hard to get a full body shot that actually captures the depth that’s going on within this piece, so one close up is in order so that you may better see what I see.
Then completely out of order we have the most recent photo of the red/yellow work:
More in line with how this post started, I’d like to remind everyone myself included. To always
Be Brave, Be Bold and Thrive in the life you have. It’ll change.. So hold on to the people and places that made or make your heart smile. It’s a long but fast journey that we have on this planet. Make it the best day ever….
Many of you know about some of the most private details of my life at this point..
Some of you would even say I’ve over shared…
I guess that’s the beauty of what happens here we all have a choice. To come together under a common bond and share the joys and
sorrows of each others lives. Some to comment, some to watch from the shadows and judge. Either way I made a decision when I first started
blog to be open. Many people forget that this site didn’t start as an Art blog but as my personal journal cataloging my life and struggles with coming to
terms with Young Onset Parkinson’s disease. This journey has taken me around the united states and abroad I’m happy to say I’ve shared every step along the ways, the good the bad and the very ugly personal truths of my life that in reality many of us share in common but would never put out there the way I do.
I’ve said it before and Ill stand by it. I’m a man, no different than any other with the slight exception that I paint and write my heart and soul for all to see. I end 99% of my posts with a kind word. And I pose some hard questions and thoughts because I believe that one man and one voice can change the world.
Art and words have lost their meaning and I will not stand for it another second. For if YOU will not Be Brave and Be Bold or Thrive in the life you have….. I will. If given the chance I would take your hand and shout your name from the roof tops to show the world your brilliance and compassion. Live your words or don’t use them at all. At this point I’ve lost all of it. My job, my career my home and my family and Ill be dammed if I’m going to silence my heart and soul now.
I just received word that I’ve been accepted into a local art co-op. 4 floors of prime down town retail, commercial and loft living space. A place that is positioning its self at the edge of creating an new feel a new scene thriving and ready to make Art believable again. Any person can put brush to canvas, lead to paper and glue a stone to a ring. But only a few can create through there passion to express that love, fear and strength through their art. So again I say…to you.
Be Brave, Be Bold and Thrive in the life you have… No… life is not easy for any of us. But if I can live through the things I’ve seen, done and had happen to me then you can too. I believe in you. I’ve seen your strength, beauty and passion.
That’s all I’ve to say. Namaste Benjamin 1970-current “A life in progress”
The Story behind the Art and Artist of Tempest:
Id like to say my life was a fairy tale full of dreams fulfilled, wishes granted
and time well spent. To do so would be far from the truth and a rather boring story.
In Tempest we see the turbulent clouds of dark purple and green both colors hopeful yet full
of a troubled heart and life. Struggling to find my way on this new path that life has chosen for me.
The form of the figure one could say is female in its curves full of soft sweeping motion and a resemblance
of a musical clef. I her shoulder and breast is a figurative form of infinity giving reference to a belief that I have
that all things are one both past and present. Also in reference to our human cycle of life destined to
repeat our pasts until the puzzle is solved.
She holds her head high above the sky yet in a position of sadness as so often I do. Sad for the hurt in this world,
sad for the hurt in my soul. The window shines a soft yet illuminating light and for me is also the window to my heart
and soul. of two minds hoping to give light to those I encounter in this lifetime and the light that shines out of the darkness
that I so often find myself in. One could ask how someone so tormented could always wishes everyone well, joy, love and happiness.
Its simple I don’t ever want anyone to live through see or feel things that I’ve experienced in my life.
The window, of hope in the darkness.
The spheres find their way to the Tempests side as she stands strong in the calm of the dark purple calm.
Circles, we could write a book on the metaphorical meaning of the circle. Matter of fact there is probably
a guy sipping scotch on a beach somewhere who has. For me in this piece the are eternal, life, death alpha and omega.
From one we have the tree of life emerging from the darkness of the shadow. An ever-present reminder that even in
the darkest of times life will find a way to carry on. From the other sphere we have a cord somewhat of an umbilical
to the tempest also representing the twists and turn of this elegant dance of existence we call life.
Please take from this piece what you will it has and never will be my intent to force my will upon the viewer.
Life is hard, mine, yours, his and hers but life is also beautiful full of hidden graces.
The spring breeze scented with flowers that come but once a year.
Summer sunsets so magical people make a living chasing them down to simply capture the moment.
A child’s first breath and the unconditional love of an old friend.
First kisses and last dances these are the things that make weathering the storm worth living.
So it is with these words from my heart to yours I give you and world. The Tempest.
Tempest ~ My Girl Collection
41.5″ x 48.5′
Mixed media
Inks and Acrylics
2014
Close up 1.
Close up 2.
Close up 3.
Where we started.. As always Be Brave, Be Bold and Thrive in the life you have.
Namaste
Benjamin
2014
A life in Progress
**Ink sketch done by Picasso
I’d like to say I’ve been out and about shaking the art world to its very chore, but I’m not sure it has a singular core any more and I’m pretty sure it would take more than me  writing to you from the comfort of my sleeping couch.
Though today has been a magical day of sorts. I enjoyed the early dawn hours alone outside and alone in my studio. I painted on one whilst preparing to say good bye to another. My Girl ~ Venus in Blue
14″x26″
Mixed media
*commission gift
Join me in saying good bye.
My Girl~Venus in Blue leaves tomorrow .
She’ll be missed, but I’d rather spread joy than own a piece of my own work.
I was also able to simply spend some time enjoying the studio here are a couple of pics you’d never see unless you were to come over at 1,2,3am.
A little morning music by candle light , always nice.
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At this stage with the next My Girl series I’m just doing the color blocking and basic shading. In pieces like this hundreds of hour can be spent doing just shading. Once the lower half get to a good point I’ll start figuring out how I’d like the back ground to fit into the piece. Thankfully in doing so it will give definition and depth to the foreground form. There is still a ton of charcoal shading lines that I’ve not washed off so please excuse the roughness of the edges. Also the introduction of the background will fix the fuzzed line. Well I started my new meds today and I must say they’re pretty strong for me at least, clonozapam. It’s going to take some time to get adjusted to this as it makes me really really sleepy. But on the plus side I’ve only taken 2 of the 6-8 Percocet I usually take a day. Okay well it’s time for dinner around here soon going to disappear for a quick minute.
Much love and light to all.