The Day, some paint and a tune.

I couldn’t rightly leave my only post for the day that depressing piece of shite I posted this morning 2:38a. Today I think has been coming for quite some time. For the past few months I’ve been observing my body slowly loosing control of its self, new pains, new physical and emotional challenges that kind of came to a head today. Thankfully I have a pretty responsive medical team so as of now I’ll be seeing my GP, neurologist and psyc all within a span of two weeks and hopefully I’ll be feeling a bit better by holiday.
So that’s The Day:
Some Paint:

Yes I’m cheating and recycling year days photo, this morning I was able to sand and prime this piece for its 3 rd and 4th time. By tonight it should be ready for a base coat of gesso which I will let dry overnight before I attempt to add any color. This piece I’ve already completed in my head so once the texture is done the painting should go semi quickly. On a positive note Green Girl will be leaving for her new home tomorrow.

I have faith that her new owner will cherish her as much as I and many of you have.
Some unplanned words previously posted but I felt worthy to read again.

My Muse: My Escape:My Soul

As the pain creeps in and the shakes soon begin
I’m taken to place where my head starts to spin.
Of lovers lost or soon to be found. Of things I’ve forgotten
Or left on the ground.
A passage a puzzle a place in my heart
An ending a torture my muse is apart,
Of life and love or little white gloves
Please chase away this pain.
Give me shelter inside a place I can hide
From angels and demons
And reasonable reasons.
One night, one kiss, would I remiss
The brain wants what the body can’t have
And the heart can’t handle.

And now for a tune:

The words to this song really hit the point for me.
Okay well that’s about what I left in me today. PT this morning was challenging as I new it would be. But what the one thing I always try to tell you and remind myself of?
“Never Give Up” today I was close, closer than I’ve ever been. Thanks to a few kind words, beer and a ton of sleep I have at least one more day of fight left in me.

All my love and thanks to those who have seen me this far on the journey, I couldn’t stop now, there’s painting to do 😉

*feature piece
Pi guy and the cowboy


And so it begins

In just a few short hours I will be at one of my least favorite spots in the planet. Yes you got it, the doctors and not just any docs but my movement specialist.
Fancy name for my Parkinson’s neurologist. It can be kind of depressing because its such a huge reminder of the finality of this disease. The whole “un-curable” thing speaks loudly when I’m there. Normally on a daddy to day basis I try not to think about that lovely word and just live my life as anyone would. But there its all about how far along are you where has your progression come since lay we spoke. I think anytime your forced to say the words out loud it makes them that much more real.

I hope the world is kind to you today, may it guide you to new places new heights and make your dreams come true. Until we meet again.


Home at last


Well it’s been one hell of a day, picked up Gryph this morning thinking that we’d have some coffee then head to the doctors, well the appointment got moved to 1:45p which was good and bad. Plenty of time to hang out and talk about what he was experiencing and how he felt about it, fears, questions and such, also plenty of time for my PD to go nuts. Spent the morning catching up about his job and lovely baby girl, so. Cute, when I worked down town they used to come and see me, such a little flirt. So Gryph and I settled into a local coffee shop and started to sort things out, he asking about my progression. I asking about his and how long and wtf dude I can’t believe you didn’t call me sooner, men sheesh I tell ya, hold it all back until it explodes then wonder why nobody understands, lol. So myoclonic seizure sounds shitty when it’s mystery texted to you at random, looks even worse when it’s somebody you’ve known since you were just a we Ladd. Gryphons a Scott just like Michael was so I hold a special place for him, Michael for those of you just tuning in was my soul brother from another mother, comrad in arms, and in general my bestie until I was in my late 20’s. Any how after hours and hours waiting for the mad scientists to do their thing we still no nothing. We took a little trip to the local mall whilst waiting for time to past and work off some of the coffee that neither of us twitchy guys needed, him with his myoclonic jerks and me with my dystonia, I tell ya heads were turning isn our tiny little town. Then as if destined by god we ran into this fella I know on a professional level who has turrets. So heres Mr.Wiggles, twitchy and fuck you walking through the mall omg can you say one season sitcom in the making, lol. Anyhow it was funny as heck. Long story longer, 5:45 pm pst I get Gryph home safe and sound, I go pickup my tiny from his schools valentine dance now 6:30 I’ve had no food 25 PD pills I’m tired and stressed and thankful to be home. To those of you who kept in touch today, thank you kindly. TRULY, you really were my strength today. Now I’m done I’m going to eat nothing because I’m on this damn diet and don’t have the energy to cook. So bless you all, may your lives be full of love, compassion and forgiveness.

Greetings human


Hello folks just thought I’d pop in and say HI, doctors appointments = waiting 😦 it’s so strange not to be in the studio or at the doctor for myself. Any how hope all are well today, sure do miss everybody. And please remember Be brave, be bold and thrive in the life you have.