~Wanting~Soft whispers of the night 

Leading to silence, only

Echoes of thoughts and 

Dreams lost. 

Secrets never spoken.

Never dared to cross the lips and

heart of man as I walk blind and

cold through this life frozen by fear.

Forever in a search born from the pleasure  

her body bares, the quiet gifts of love that 

warms this soul and eases my busy mind.

b. 2015-2016 

“On heartstrings they played the saddest song”

It’s over- My heart grieves

But, my head does not, for anyone who asks or tells you (me) to sacrifice your health and wellbeing of them DOES NOT DESERVE TO BE IN YOUR LIFE.

I want to thank again the many many people who have come to support, read,follow, like or share my story. There are no words written only whispered in the in the night that could ever express the gratitude I have for each, and, every one of YOU.
“Be brave be bold and thrive in the life you have.”


The great train.

There was no way of knowing when the train would come. I watched as it pulled out of the station and began to gather speed.
I watched it travel over hills and mountains It seemed almost to good to be true, until one day it stopped. . In a panic all on board fled in fear for they knew not why the great train had stopped so suddenly.
I watched as the passengers grieved for the great train. Slowly one by one they said their goodbyes. Some with tears of never ending sadness. Others with fits of rage….. Until finally the smallest of children came to say goodbye and she wept for she knew it was the last time they’d meet.
The end.
“Just a page in someone else’s story.”
**all rights reserved.


And then there was one

there is silence in the air today that whispers of sadness for loves lost and friends betrayed.
I can hear the cars in the distance, a constant hum of the machanical sea created to push us closer to the end.
slowly they drownd out the soft voice of your rememberance .
lost in a spinning breeze of my life i grasp at passing branches to
again hold myseld high.
but ive no strength ,no passion, no heart to carry this weight.
i have grown to weak and these burdens to heavy to continue. i fear what the future holds
they say your strong and youve done this before you can do it again.

BUT what if i dont want to. what if this sucks and hurts to much? what then, what do you do when everything is taken away,again and again? i have no nails to rebuild and no plan to make perfect for its been taken from me,like a good idea stolen in a backroom bargin.

“If I feel in love with you,would you promise to be true….

I’m fearful of loving for I bare my soul to quickly.
I search to deeply and except
Less than I deserve .
For I feel I deserve nothing.
I feel nothing anymore at times
But fear of being alone in my bed,heart and soul.
But mostly I fear the deathlights
Coming and finding my hand empty  of love.
A heart cold from mistrust and
Tainted by the memories of my life
Forgotten as a child
Brutalized as a teen
Lost as a young man
And destroyed as grown man.
I try so hard yet fail time and again searching
for the answers of my life.

All I’ve ever wanted is to rest safely in the arms of my Angel
And simply rest my weary mind,heart and soul.
The end.

“My life and times.”