Love

I can not give what I do not have and I do not have what I have not been given.

Love is lost in me these days my eyes have become blind and my heart numb to the touch of another soul. For I fear that all of me will be lost again. I love to love but my fear has grown to where I doubt I doubt that I am worthy of love. What deeds have I not paid for with blood sweat and tears in this life time. I did not come from a silver spoon, I’ve scraped and scrapped to get what I had. Now only to find in my dreams and fading memory.

Love, this beast of burden I fear more than cherish yet the still inside, a small boy longs to be held. It’s been to long.. The road to hard to bare alone.. yet alone I stand judged and cruisified before Ive even begun to live a life for me. These bones are tired of games tired of the challenges of youth. Ive learned to accept what it is for what it is, sadly a little to late for what was. Now I’m left with nothing but time thousand,thousand years of sleep. Dreaming of what adventures lay in waiting to raise me once again from these patterns of life.

Love a warm and relentless place to live.

B.

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3 thoughts on “Love

  1. I wanted to quote the lines that spoke to me but i kept finding so many it would quoting practically the whole piece… It strangely doesn’t feel so bad to know I’m not the only one. Thank you for writing this.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you,
      The experience I had most recently has left me so torn. I fight the rage and pure sorrow daily. But I can not change anything so I move forward in grief and rage. Just like when someone dies, feels exactly the same.

      Like

      • I had a recent experience too. But more than rage i feel sorrowful, defeated and lost. I don’t think I can ever trust someone like I did before. You’re right, it is like when someone dies.

        Liked by 1 person

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