Cancer…Then and now..

Hi, I haven’t written much on my cancer battle. Mostly I’ve left this space for Art, life drama and my adventures with Parkinson’s disease. Though these days it seems fitting to start talking about my experience openly. Nearly 1 year ago on 4_17_17 I was given my first all clear “NO-CANCER!!! Still to this day cancer free. After the previous 10 weeks of what was one of it not the most challenging years of my life. I’m thankful everyday for the life I have been given and have left to live. After the trauma my PD caueed to my life I wasn’t about to let cancer mess everything up again but little did I know not much was up to me. See the cold truth is, people don’t like to watch other people die. Especially if you actually know the person well. So as my cancer treatments progressed my friend group shrank and shrank, basically to the point where it was myself and my carer or driver in this case. A few good friends, some of which I saw only once the whole time some everyother weekend. The point being between cancer and Parkinson’s disease they have made me truly appreciate the people who stuck it out. Now I find myself in a place of limbo, 100 lbs. lighter, my Cigna LTD payments no longer coming **lawsuit pending** I’ve a head full of chemo and radiation leftovers and my PD is way worse than before.(Never fear)

There is one thing I take away from this whole experience, it’s the fact that if you put your true heart and soul behind something you can do it. I beat cancer, I live with Parkinson’s disease. I live with a pain rating around 6-7 and walk with a cane and full leg brace on the left side, I’ve a failing balance and strength I’m considered a “High Risk” for falls but you know what? At the end of the day those things are not who or what I am. They are things that have happened to this body. Honestly it’s pretty simple, I chose each day to try. Try to walk better,think clearer, talk more fluidly and not live in a panic or anxiety driven state. I still try to lift those up around me the best I can, I try to daily give thanks and prayer for the wealth and happiness I do have. So yeah, cancer then and now. Always scary, always in the back of my head like a shadow waiting to hitch a ride, but never do give it an inch. I intend to paint and write until the bitter end. I hope as you read this that you can realize you have the strength same as I,, you have the power,wisdom and knowledge to be,do anything you chose in this life. So brave,be bold and thrive in the life you have. You never know when it will change.

Benjamin-2018

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2 thoughts on “Cancer…Then and now..

    • Hi thank you. Diet and exercise has been a challenge, diet has been dictated by the cancer healing process and exercise has been hampered by my Parkinson’s disease progress. Though I walk a small amount daily most activity induces fatigue and pain.

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