Today I talked at great lengths about what it means to live a life you don’t want. To find peace or atleast complacency during the crisis. If you haven’t heard my p.e.t. scan is coming up onthe 11th of this month and im having some teoubke dealing with the anxiety that come with waiting for the test them ofcourse waiting for the results. This next twst will determine if i do or do not have cancer. Whether or not this cancer spread to anywhere else. There was a 50/50 chance that even with treatment that this cancer eould spread. So we shall see. Until then if i seem stressed or down now you know why. Plus 1 of the 3 people i have helping me personlly through this is out if town that week so my normal emotional safety net wont be here 😦 

But I went to my first treatment alone I’ll make it through this. Then comes the tough choice. If i cancer still do i continue the fight or do i let things progress as they do. I can’t tell you how hard it is to go through cancer and Parkinson’s disease at the same time. If i dont have cancer then i have the question i have to ask myself at 46 where and how do i want to live my life. On that note my dinner has cooled to a reasonable temp. Time to eat. 

Much love.
B.2017
“A life in progress”