The white cliff of tomorrow that never came..*morning ramble.

I dove into the Heart of Darkness it’s there where you found me, they came for me in haste waves of hurry up and wait, followed by hours ,weeks ,months of torture. I dove into the Heart of Darkness and that’s where you found me. A Shining Star, The Guiding Light to wake to. A soft glow to lay my head upon. A to pillow find my day. Now I wait I’m slowly grinding down. I wait for once again to climb into the chamber have my guts explored by science does this cancerous pain still live deep-seated in my genes. 

Or shall this Genesis be a true renewal of all faith and prayers sent. I passed through this life in such discord and mystery . My thoughts float from space to space while colors blur from grey to green and green to blue ,blue to tan and Back Again everything fades memories people ,places things break ,feelings ,hearts Trinkets and toys left behind a child’s mom so tender never should have been awake or so such a recording this life for others to see breaks my heart the humanities so unkind and yet greed flourishes so deeply but we cannot cure our own kind of the devices we’ve made and paths laid in stone crumble over time like lost loves and the focus of my mind. 

Friend groups come and go. Families ebb and flow in tides of time and change, opinions and words unexpressed. Tired so tired of fighting but that’s all I have these days.  The fight is the journey, the fight is the path and struggle. Only time will tell what and how this story of mine unfolds. 

Benjamin.
2017
“A life in progress.”

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