It’s funny the expectations we put on ourselves at times. These feelings of completion we assign certain tasks or events. Well the Something Red show has come and gone. Sadly I didn’t even get an honorable mention. I’m kind of not sure how I feel about that.
I really shouldn’t be bothered, I know I’m a successful artists based on the feedback I get daily from people yet to not even get mentioned after winning last year is kind of a let down. Though I’m not sure where my feelings rest. If I’m disappointed in myself for not trying harder or somehow knowing the type if art that would be “successful” this year or not. I guess it’s normal to feel disappointed. Anyhow that’s that thanks for listening to me bitch about my life lol. Really I’m thankful, very thankful just to be able to walk and still hold a fork, feed myself and recognize my love ones faces. These to me seem like more important things.
Yesterday I posted this piece as a work in progress “untitled” today I’ve her name came to me.
This summer after a series of unfortunate events I learned a hard lesson in life at least hard for me. I learned that no matter how much you love someone you can never make them love you, that love that one gives doesn’t always come back to us in the way we hoped or in the way we hoped to give it. Just as my travels where coming to and end this September and as my life became more overwhelming than it has ever been. I have up. I broke. I truly believed that I’d become unloveable and unworthy of love. Then as life often does it gave me a gift a rough unpolished gift of connection, pure, natural connection. I’m happier now than I’ve been in a while and I’ve started to realize that I am worthy of love still. That I’m not the sum of my demons but the man that has survived them. If you’d like to see the first “Love” please follow the link. http://theeclecticpoet.com/2014/03/01/love-lives-here-now/
Well my friend it’s time for med and a nap. I’m currently working without a Parkinson’s Advocate which has me a bit unsettled I’ve learned from my passed mistakes that not all families and friend can handle the burden of Parkinson’s disease so in this new life I’m really trying to not burden my life upon others. Makes life pretty damn tricky.
Another day then…
Much love and light.
“A life in progress”