Pain~a Parkinson’s song

The pain of this body
Finds me before the dawn
On this summers day.
I wake to the still of night
Wracked with this torturous
Hell of body fights body
Limbs twist and pull
At each other as mans
Medicine fails time and
Again to ease the burden
Of this broken heart
And broken body.

The time moves so slowly
On these days as I find my last
Steps.
Waiting in the wings as life passes
Me by, even the elders speed by
Walkers in hand as the disease holds
Fast.
Weep, weep does my inner child as
The man drags these borrowed bones
From place to place.
A smile on my face as I worry and wonder what comes next.
Tired, so tired of the follies of this
Earth. Leaving me weak of heart and shaken as a man seeing his life fade.
Painting my days away in hopes to leave a small piece of heart, mind and soul behind for all to remember.
Ode’d to my ever present pain and fickle mistress of the mind and body.

Benjamin
2014

20140719-040834-14914938.jpg
“Burden”
12″x12″
Currently in display in the Salem public library.

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13 thoughts on “Pain~a Parkinson’s song

  1. Oh, Ben, I wish I were actually near enough to give you a proper hug. The virtual kind will have to suffice for the moment. Love and warmth and imagined arms round you, Ali xxx

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    • Sigh~ my friend if I could I’d bury myself in the hills of Derbyshire and sleep till these days of pain and broken promise fade I surely would. The aching of body, heart, mind and soul has been so great since I came back.

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      • I am so sorry to hear this, Ben, though your posts had led me to suspect as much. I wish there were something I could say that would ease the pain for you. I guess all I can say is that you are loved, very much, and that people feel your pain with you.
        If you are able to come over this way some time during 2014, that would be lovely; it would be so damn good to see you again – and catch up properly. Meanwhile, hugs, and thinking of you, Ali xxx

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  2. Benjamin, I wish there was something that I could say or do that would take away some of your pain and frustration. I can only imagine how difficult it must be to feel so limited and tortured by the body in which you live. Your poem is powerful; your art work is beautiful; and the spirit that moves you to create glorious. With hugs….Kim

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    • Thank you Kim. I’m in such a strange place these days. Fighting my body, guarding my heart and minding my tongue. But there are times the physical pin of this body speaks louder than I can contain. I appreciate your kindness. I hope the day brings great joy to your life.
      Always
      Benjamin

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  3. please don’t forget, even with your broken body, that you are alive, benjamin. you are as alive as anyone else on this earth. with paint and pills and passion all.

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