The dawn waits for no man, neither does Parkinson’s disease

**This is not poetic, nor happy it’s also not a cry for help. It simply just is.


I’ve come to hate mornings
They leave me broken and tired
Recovering from my dance with the
Sandman.
There was a time when the dawn called my name
with a glorious song and colors flooded my world.
Now I find only pain and the relentless crush of this disease.
There are no words I can give you that truly explain the
persistence of Parkinson’s disease. It simply never stops.
Never let’s go. There are times that I want to just be done
be done fighting. Be done taking pills for pain and pills
to replace the chemicals my brain no longer makes.

There was a time when the mornings song was a gift
the predawn stillness, the first birds of the day.
Me and a strong espresso, dreaming of all the
things I’d fill my life with.
Now its a race, a race for the first pills of the day
a race to stay one step ahead of the pain. A race to
learn the tricks of he brain as my cognitive functions change.
as I sit here and write these words out of my head and heart
placing them in space instead of myself, I feel the sadness settle
in. This sadness tells me its time to go, it tells me I’ve
rested to long in this place of thought and self analyzing
deprecation. So I leave you with these thoughts from a
man who has been graced with a life full of adventure
love and heartbreak. Don’t wait for life to give you the
things you want. You must make them happen. You must visualize
yourself in the place you want to be and make it so. For tomorrow
never comes so must seize the day or forever let it slip away.
20140109-035241.jpg
The Long Road
36″x48″
Acrylics and Ink
2012 Parkinson’s Series

Namaste
Benjamin
2014

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16 thoughts on “The dawn waits for no man, neither does Parkinson’s disease

    • That’s Kei, really it’s just the old saying if better out than in. I just get so tired of being broken. They say that Yopd comes on strong and fast, I’m only 2+ years into my DX so get frustrated easily at times.
      Xo
      B

      Like

      • No one would blame you for that Ben. I wish that research could progress at a pace that at least matched. Or even that disease management techniques were better. Thinking of you today. xo

        Like

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