Sometimes I feel me slipping away..
Beneath the pills and pain.
Silently watching the shakes and quakes.
Silently screaming as the words fail time and time again to come from my mind to my mouth.
The worst nightmare one can imagine.
To slowly slip away in both body and mind. To watch helplessly as one fades….fades away…..
Like a cannibal chef slowly carving off slices,..one…piece at a time… Taken away by the sandman.
Rotten bastard that he is…
So much memories hovering just above,….Just out if reach.
It’s comical to watch a life fade away in a burning bright cosmic flash of brilliance dimmed by time, fear and pain.
More pills create more movement
More movement creates
More pain… More pain creates more pills and the circle is complete.
Painting brings me peace
It brings a place where I
Can be with me, calm whole
No wiggles no shakes
Just the rhythm of the paint
The smell, taste and touch
Colors only eye can see
Keeping me at peace with myself
Locked away deep in my life hidden from all eyes.
I feel me dying each day and I’m worried.
Free yet trapped by my connection with this form.