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I wonder why?

The dawn came calling in the dark of the night
The world still slumbering as I rose to meet you,
But you’d gone.
Left behind the taste of disagreement and scorn.
What words of man fill these pages of black and white.
Dribbles of thought and human emotion cast into a sea of darkness.
One by one they get picked apart, ingested and set free.
Like pigeons on the rooftops we hope they’ll find their way home.

Such a silent dawn it is, so many caught up with the winds
and rain. Letters lost, time out of focus as I struggle to remember the days
Name then wonder why it’s important to begin with, such a paradox this life can be. Waiting for the chems to kick-in a train sounds in the distance carried by a cool breeze, a sound heard by only those lucky or misfortunate to be awake. So many visions crammed into one skull I often wonder why, why me? Why this darkness that haunts the corners of my mind. Oh to be held in the gentle arms of an angel to rest my head and heart for just one more day.

I can hear the city start to wake. The broken and fearful the hungry and lost souls of day scattering their desires on the soundscape. One more day, one more paycheck, one more cheeseburger and then it’s done. Chasing a lucid daydream till the body becomes old and frail. Running from death, born with the awareness we are alive. Is it a gift or a curse and does the fish I ate. Know it’s name, does he go to fishy heaven or miss his frye? I wonder the point of all these things as these words fall from the sky, catching one at a time and finding a place for them to live in this world.
I wonder. I always have,… I wonder why..

Benjamin
2014

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Heartstrings and thing

Given the hearts of man pulled by the stars above
and the oceans below tis no surprise
our wandering hearts break so easily.
Great knights with armor so
do carry that burden of the stars and below.
With each ebb and tide as the moon wanes
as so do I, find myself caught
In the tide wash and flow.
Such madness of being
these heartstrings and things.
Paint and prose a wild growing rose
Kisses at midnight and tickling toes.
All these things of a guarded heart knows
Yet simply keeps kept where
the secret garden grows.

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Benjamin
2014

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My day in a few words and some paint

If I gave you my heart
Would you steal it away
To find me sitting
On this foggy day

Alone and cold
Shivering inside
Simply a motion
I just can not hide

Painters and poets
The bricks that
They lay
Creating the future
Foundations that stay

For today’s tomorrow’s
The old ways return
Abstract expression
For true heart they yearn.

Benjamin
2013

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17.10.13
“one line”
Madams Parasol
A series of daily drawings done with only one line once the pen touches the paper no picking up, that’s the rule. ;)
Sans to be signed.

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Early AM thoughts

What gives you strength? Or the peace of mind to carry on? I think humans live day to day because we have been given the gift of being self aware. As our planet spins through the universe we have the ability to pick a point in relative perceived time and space and say I am or was here, and therefore I am.
Is it a gift or a curse.? I’ve been thinking if these things a lot lately as I watch my own clock tick away, fighting my daily battles with pain and Parkinson’s, watching my children grow up. My once black hair turning shades of grey ;)
My once deep cerulean eyes fade

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I sometimes find living in the now a bit like flying through an endless cavern peaceful and calm until you take the blinders off and realize your traveling at 24,000 miles an hour with no breaks in a spaceship that has little chance of repair and only limited life support. Then…, well I find it a bit scary as hell… I sleep very little which in a way is good as for the most part out if of the 24 hours a day we are given I’m usually awake for 19 or 20 of them so I guess when the time comes and PD locks me inside these borrowed bones I’ll have plenty to reflect upon.

Art, someone commented about my art in a way that I found captured the concept of what I do so well, the said “Love this :) your art carries so much emotional energy !! Just love it :)” Emotional energy those two words I think capture what I’m doing here in my little poorly lit studio. I’ve alway strived to make people feel. I have an opinion that one of the things that is desperately wrong with our society is we collectively have stopped feeling, we’ve been desensitized. For instance when I was growing up you had to stay up till midnight and watch Benny Hill to get a glimpse of a breast or a bra and now you can see more T & A, real time murder and destruction before breakfast is even cooked. Sadly most people don’t even blink an eye at any of it. Any how, I’m ranting now instead of waxing philosophical about time. I’m told it’s Friday so Happy Friday!!! Great job you made it!!! Another week well done :-D
As always thanks for stopping by and tolerating my early AM monkey mind, may the day be kind to you and you to it.
My Friday challenge to all: Make one person smile, :-D

Much love
Benjamin

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Time….relative and otherwise

It’s a strange concept this thing called time. When we are young we think we have “all the time in the world” and when we are grown we wonder where all the time went. I ponder this anonymously called time often as our planet spins and I talk to friends from around the globe. Wishing someone good morning can be so relative pending on where your from or if you even share the same “time zone”. I go with my youngest today to register him for his Freshman year in HS. As a father no different from any other it trips me out a little as I was the one who cut his umbilical cord and whispered his first promise in his ear when he was just seconds on the planet of ours. Born the length of my forearm and slept by my side protected and safe from harm for over ten years. Each night I would read to him and we would share our thoughts, laughs and questions of the world. ” Dad why is up called up”? Now I send him off to a place of judgment and angst. Makes me proud and nervous all at once. I pray I’ve given him the skills to thrive in this life, as this once small protected child of mine now stands at 6’1″ taller than I.

20130712-040725.jpgAs most loving parents say I’m lucky, I have great kids, the thing that makes me sure of this is the fact that im told this by other people. I think thats the true measure of a parents success. Are they happy, healthy. Its odd that I sit here and share these things as I am feircly protective on my boy. As he sleeps and I type I cant help but be amazed at the passing of time.
So amongst this fathers ramble the point of it all. Take time, take time to tell the ones you love that you do. Make time for the friends you have that you never call. Take time to heal your broken hearts, and wounded souls. For there will come a time when you’ll ask yourself “where did it all go so quickly”

Much love and light.
Benjamin
2013

Wordy words and song….

~Small Coins~

You can feel the summer slowly start loosen its grip as the crickets come back out to sing.
The sky starts it journey towards darkness just a little earlier every night.
The summer fruits have come and gone i welcome the bats as they will return shortly.
I can feel change in the winds, yet for the first time in what feels like a thousand years I have no fear of them.
I do not go quietly into the night
For I will sing with the crickets and fly with the bats as I paint what’s left of my story…..

Benjamin
2013

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What to do….?

Each day as the dawn draws back i hear echoes of thoughts waft through my mind of things to come and things gone by.
I sit and ponder the gifts of the day, my breath, my heart, my love and compassion for all living things. What gifts we bring to the world and what we
ask in return from this perilous oh so vast expanse of space we occupy.

Today; ups,print store,car wash,studio, my favorite place the paint store. I don’t work in the sense of what 95% of you do as I’ve been on full time disability since 2/19/13 but as you know that freedom came at a great personal cost. I am burying this next bit deep in this wordy post because it is only for those who take the time to read all the words. I have a chance to occupy a studio space in my town it would give me the opportunity to bypass the local, ” arts and craft” galleries that abound in this town and open a real working studio. If anyone wishes to contribute to this happening email me personally for the details, as a painter I have only one gift to give which is my work in exchange for such a chance. Today brings great hope to our world for it is a new day, a new chance to be the great humans we were all born to be. Some of us writers of words for lovers and lost souls or painters of things yet seen by this world. All of us are equally important and gifted in each right. Never forget that. Who you are and what you bring to life by simply existing is a gift unique only unto yourself, something know one besides you has to give. So shine on, the star that you are and look no further than the mirror in front of you for the beauty and strength you seek for its been in you the entire time.
All my love, all my strength I give to you for I need it not on this day or any other.

Namaste
Benjamin

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How time flys

I came to you a broken man
You filled my heart with joy

I came to you lost without a home
You opened your doors and welcomed

With shakes and quakes I came at all hours of the day and night.
You always gave me shelter.

Through rain and pain you gave me comfort.
Through fear and flight I gave you hope and a kind word.

To: All and anyone reading this post I wanted to say thank you. You truly have no idea how much my WP community means to me:
9 month 2 weeks 639 followers
1030 posts 13.5k comments
43,000 views
And it hasn’t even been a full year.
I started this blog out of a need. A need to not be alone in my life, I’ve never have had a blog or online presence before. I was alone and scared with my Parkinson’s all I had was my art yet not a single person to share it with. I had pain and PD and paint. Now I can add people to the list which has given me again more hope and joy in my life than many of you could ever fathom. So while I can, let me give thanks. I give thanks to you. The people that take the time to comment, reply, interact and be a part of this experience with me.
On bended knee with all the love and strength I have. Thank you I never would have stayed if it wasn’t for you.

Namaste
Benjamin M. Prewitt
Painter,poet,warrior and friend.

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5 hrs later…..?

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Time flys when your up to your eyes balsa in paint. I was shocked how much time had gone by and then by what felt like so little accomplished. I’ve been to develop some depth and tonal distinction within this piece. I hope the day has been treating everyone with kindness and love today. So far:

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All the same painting just bits and pieces of it to share.

Namaste
Benjamin

Tomorrow never comes…

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**To be clear this is not a sad post if you take one thing away from “tomorrow never comes” is please live for today!!
When writing this blog I’ve learned a lot about myself the good, bad and ugly. But with this type of site it requires me to be very honest with not only my views but myself. Thank you for letting me grow through this medium and supporting in these ever changing time of my life.

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4:A 2/8/13

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Studio time a bit later :-)
Much love, in your life. Be brave. Be bold. Thrive in all you do.
Namaste
Benjamin